I had another grandmother ask me the other day about how to handle the grand kids when they go shopping. She said they just expect to get something new every time they go out.

We’ve all been there. It’s been a stressful shopping trip to the grocery and while you wait in line there all of these amazing things just waiting for you. They can be really irresistible, especially to toddlers. You’ve seen the meltdowns, may have even been the mama or grand mama of the little one doing the melting. Let’s get real – it’s embarrassing for every one involved!

But I have a secret that works nearly every time. It’s called Setting the Expectation. I use this tactic with my three year old grandson a lot.

Have you ever had a little one that just refuses to ride in a cart? In some stores that’s ok. In others, not so much and getting into a cart is non-negotiable. So before you even get out of the car, Set the Expectation that they will have to ride in the cart. If a melt down begins and they won’t get into the cart, leave immediately. Give them a moment to calm down and ask if they would like to go back, but don’t change your expectation.

How about the kids who cry for toys, candy, gum and other stuff? Again, Set the Expectation before you get out of the car. Let them know that as a reward for good behavior they will get a prize when you leave – it could be something as simple as getting a piece of gum or having some screen time when they get home. If it’s a toy they are after, give them a dollar amount they can spend, but bad behavior will make the toy go back on the shelf.

Kid’s don’t always need a reward. Sometimes there is no time or extra money for special treats when shopping – especially when you need to run in to get just an item or two. Tell the kids upfront that you will only be picking up a few things and toys are not on the list. Tell them not to even ask for extras. You will be surprised just by saying this, kids won’t ask. Although lots of hints are usually given to see if you might give in.

Setting the Expectation works in many situations. Even the dinner table. We have dinner table rules. We also have restaurant rules. After you go over them and practice a few times, dinner will become a breeze.

After a while, kids will “get it” and you won’t even need to have to remind them. However, when in doubt, Set the Expectation. You’ve got this!

Namaste, Y’all

Lori, Blissful Granny